Although to be fair, with my eldest two, I didn’t do a great job of listening to their musical choices. I’m still blissfully unaware of most songs by Slipknot, Avenged Sevenfold and someone who’s name may or may not be Dimebag Darrell, and only had to listen to a few by My Chemical Romance (which for the record I kind of liked so I may well be the world’s first and only grey-haired Emo).

With Bobby it’s been a different kettle of fish. As a two and now three year old, he hasn’t yet grasped the concepts of waiting or “Daddy time” so when he grabs my hand and does the big doe eyed smile to drag me to watch the Wiggles, I usually succumb.

Until Bobby came along, I’d somehow managed to avoid listening to the Wiggles and wasn’t keen to, but now I reckon I know pretty much most of their back catalog of songs, video clips and choreography included.

It even got to a point that a mate of mine and I were debating the relative merits of the two yellow Wiggles between points in a game of tennis as if they were David Lee Roth and Sammy Hagar. Dated reference? How about Glen Shorrock and John Farnham? Bon Scott and Brian Johnson?

Nothing? Seriously, you guys need to listen to more music or I need to update my musical tastes.

Anyway, I now know and actually find myself singing along to their songs and brought into the whole Wiggle one big happy family shtick.

I even welcomed the news that Greg was returning but then, like everyone, was left feeling flabbergasted at their handling of the matter. No doubt it will be studied for years to come in Public Relations classes under the heading of Epic Fails.

And that “one big happy family” thing was probably what upset families the most.

On stage and on DVD, they are all best friends, dropping over to Dorothy’s for a cup or Rosy Tea or visiting Captain Feathersword to play with his musical buttons – which isn’t a euphemism so shame on any of you who went off on that tangent.

The regular singers and dancers on the videos outside the four wiggles and Dorothy, Wags, Henry and the Captain, have all been around for years and it certainly appeared outwardly like one big loyal happy family. Everyone gets on like a group of best friends and we, the fans (or consumers as it turns out) feel part of that and buy into it.

So there was this massive disconnect when blue wiggle Anthony Field said he hadn’t spoken to Sam about his “sacking” and didn’t know how he felt. Even though Anthony never referred to Sam as a “hired hand” as has been wrongly attributed to him, he botched the interview with Richard Wilkins royally.

Subsequent reports that they had barely spoken for years were equally surprising. That could be garbage – you get a lot of accusations from people who claim to know the full story from the inside when these things happen – but even without that you wonder how well these guys get on with each other.

Because, let’s face it, when we like a singer, or an actor, or a sports star, we gravitate towards their image and the kind of person we thought they were. It’s not necessarily fair on them, and it can put them on pedestals that are difficult to stay upright on, but it’s the cult of image and personality – we are drawn to people we think we’d like and who we think would like us.

So the ripples and repercussions following the changing of the yellow skivvy relate to two separate concerns: (1) The manner in which the message was delivered to Sam and to the world; and (2) concern as to whether these people we convince our kids are all friendly and chummy and worthy of their adoration are any of those things.

Regarding change management, geez… you’d imagine ANYONE would do a better job. You’d also think that ANYONE in that position would expect a question to be asked about how the guy being ousted is feeling. That they didn’t only makes them seem even colder and unfeeling – especially since it was a reasonably easy decision to explain. You could do it better than they did any number of ways, but here is one example of what could have been said:

Greg only ever left the band due to illness and Sam was good enough to take on the role. It wasn’t envisaged that Greg would get better and in all likelihood Sam would have worn the yellow skivvy until the band retired. But Greg is now well enough to perform again and it left us in a very difficult position. Ultimately, Greg was with us for 16 years and helped found the band so the decision for him to get the nod wasn’t very difficult but the fact his return would be at the cost of Sam was. Sam has been a brilliant friend, a brilliant performer and a loved member of the Wiggles family. It’s unfortunate that a decision had to be made, however we feel that allowing Greg back in to a position he would normally never have left except for health considerations was the right thing to do. Sam will always have our respect and friendship. We wish him well in all that follows and offer him our gratitude and support in every possible way.

The fact that the band didn’t spend much time explaining (or apparently thinking about) Sam’s situation leaves that lingering doubt about just how friendly a bunch these smiling, finger-wiggling guys are.

Many so-called experts – including some child care workers – have jumped on the bandwagon since to suggest the Wiggles content was poor in terms of educational or entertainment content for kids and that they preferred Hi-5 or someone else.

For what it’s worth, my wife’s been in child care for over a decade, has a degree in the area and she and her colleagues disagree entirely. In other words, the critics are throwing in their opinions and trying to disguise them as fact. There’s nothing wrong with the product produced by the Wiggles. I personally think it’s the best stuff on the market.

I’d still feel happier knowing they were a tight and happy bunch, and that they felt bad for Sam, and that he was still part of the extended family. But maybe those things aren’t true.

If you want to fix things, here’s a suggestion. Real wisdom of Solomon stuff this one too.

No replacing Sam. ADD Greg. Dump the yellow skivvy and replace it with an orange and a green one so that neither is perceived as the poor substitute. Both colours have been used by the Wiggles before (Anthony was originally the Green Wiggle and US weatherman Al Roker once wore Orange). Both colours are close to yellow but not quite.

This change adds variety, better harmonies, new dynamics and the best of all worlds… and given the huge amounts the company earns, surely a few extra bucks can be spared for the extra staff member. Winner, winner, chicken dinner.

That WOULD have been a good idea. But perhaps the good ship “Perfect Solutions” has sailed. How will this affect the band worldwide from here? Who knows. Probably not too much. Despite how much we grown-ups may be outraged and disappointed, our kids will still want to point their fingers and do the twist as they rockabye their bear on the way to Wiggle Bay.

It’s just a pity it happened like this. And it was all so very avoidable. If only the group had listened more to the philosophies they’ve always preached and sung about.

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