"I'm not living my life for Warren because he wouldn't want that. He would want me to live my life because of him."
That was Goulburn resident Paul Scott-Williams speaking in one of five new episodes from Cancer Council NSW's The Thing About Advanced Cancer podcasts.
The Hume Conservatorium ceo and artistic director's husband Warren was diagnosed with late-stage thymus squamous cell carcinoma in 2019, a very rare form of cancer, and died 204 days later.
That was, an undoubtedly, very tough time for him.
"When you start a relationship with somebody, you certainly don't think that if this works, one of you is probably going to be there when the other one dies," Mr Scott-Williams said.
"I was there as he took his last breath and I wasn't ready for that, but I don't regret it.
"I certainly wouldn't change it, because he wanted me to be there."
Cancer Council NSW cancer information unit manager Elizabeth Humphries said the podcast, hosted by well-known broadcaster and cancer survivor Julie McCrossin, addresses gaps in the existing resources for people caring for someone at the end of life.
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"Caring for someone with advanced cancer can be one of the most rewarding things a person can do, but it can also be one of the most challenging, and at times, isolating," Ms Humphries said.
"During this stage of a person's illness, carers and families need reliable information about palliative and end-of-life care in a format that is quick and easy to access, as well as being easy to understand.
"For carers, families and friends of people approaching the end of life, finding the right information and support can make all the difference during such a difficult time.
"We know carers are often very time-poor, so we hope that by providing this information, we can make it easier for everyone to access the information they need, whenever they need it."
Some of the things Mr Scott-Williams spoke about on the podcast was grief and how looking after Warren was a full time job.
He also talked about he didn't know what to say when he was offered help.
"I became quite stressed about the fact so many people would ask me how they would be able to help," he said.
"I didn't know.
"I wish I had found a way to let people share a bit of the burden with me if they wanted to.
"It upsets me they might feel I cut them out of the process."
To hear more about Paul Scott-William's experiences, listen to the podcast at https://www.cancercouncil.com.au/advanced-cancer-podcasts/.
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